| I hate my situation.
Also, my xanga has become nothing more than a string of depressing one-liners.
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| It makes me sad that I was at my peak in high school.
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| The idea that I really have no idea what I want to do with my life terrifies me.
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| It smells like summer outside and I don't think I've been lonelier in my entire life.
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| I can't sleep.
Sometimes I wonder if I am truly my own person or if every trait I have has been copied from an outside source.
I think about my siblings and how they had to carve out their own personalities through life lessons and their own experiences.
Then I think about myself and how I try to emulate my siblings in any way possible, if only to get their approval and to be more a part of their lives.
Would I have gone to the U of A if my siblings hadn't? Probably not.
Would I have the sense of humor I have if my siblings did not have that sense of humor in the first place? I hope so.
What would I think about kids? Pets? Jobs? Significant others? Social lives? Who even knows.
It makes me feel like I need to branch out. Be my own person. Experience life through my own lens, not the lens of my siblings.
I'm happy that I have my siblings and I'm happy that they love me.
I just wish that I could be an individual like they were forced to be.
Who am I?
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